CHANNELING IN ON TELEVISION  This column originally appeared on Wicked Local.





Like millions of couples in the United States, my wife and I settle down on the couch several times each week and think about what we are going to watch on television. 


Once upon a time, there was a much simpler solution.  There were essentially three channels to choose from and a regimented system of shows on either NBC, ABC, or CBS.  On any given night you could watch a show that aired once a week like Happy Days, M*A*S*H, or All in the Family.  You might catch a variety show like Real People, or have the (debatable) great fortune of seeing the original Battle of the Network Stars, significantly more entertaining than the revamped version that recently aired due to the fact that there were actual networks.  On weekends, you had the opportunity to watch Fantasy Island, Wide World of Sports, or be forced to watch 60 Minutes every Sunday night of your childhood with your socially conscious parents.  I actually equate the term quality time with watching television along with my father in our family den, meaning that I was relegated to watching programs that he claimed I would really like.  In most cases, he was right.  Of course, I didn’t have a choice.  There was no IPhone to stare at in bored defiance, and the television in the den was the only TV in the house.  There was no cable, no VCR, and if I had ever argued the point it would have required me getting off the couch and surveying the other two channels manually because there was also no remote.  So like a book that might be slow at the beginning, you gracefully became engulfed in what you were watching regardless of what it was and, in most cases, the few selections that were available at that time trumped (and I use that word loosely) much of what is currently on TV. 


I am overwhelmed by television today.  The attention scattered American public is bombarded with choices that seem to be aimed at quantity rather than quality.  I am so confused by the amount of programming that I attempt to keep my own viewing as simple as possible by restricting myself to CBS Sunday Morning, Chronicle, the news, Meet the Press, and basically any baseball game I can, well, catch.  My wife and I do like some of the shows on Netflix such as This is Us and a new show called Atypical, but to be completely honest I am not even sure what Netflix is or how it operates.  I do know that it allows us to watch a show that was actually on the previous two Sundays while I was attempting to golf with my friend Pete even though it might currently be Wednesday.  Netflix is usually something that she suggests and I simply nod affirmatively from the other side of the room.  The truth is, I could not watch Netflix without my wife and this is not because I enjoy the quiet television time with my lovely bride.  It is because her ability to operate the remote is our living room equivalent of having the country’s secret nuclear codes.  Suffice it to say, my special skill is turning the TV on and off. 


The fact is, many of the shows currently on television would have been cancelled long ago if there were still only three major networks, best evidenced by one channel’s perpetual run of the show Cops detailing domestic disputes from small suburban towns in 1987. 


As a society, however, we need not worry.  What goes around comes around.  There was a report out recently about rabbit ears as well as roof antennae both making a comeback with the younger generation who view these somewhat forgotten items as nostalgic, a return to simplicity, and (finally) a way to eliminate the costly cable companies from bilking the general public in return for a service that was once free if you had access to an electrical outlet. 


For this, I commend the current generation.  Keep it simple.  Watch only three channels.  Just make sure one of them is not showing Cops. 

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